The Surrender Lesson: When the Horse Turns Away

This week, I had a moment I’ll never forget. It didn’t happen during a workout. It wasn’t a win in business. It wasn’t even during some deep coaching breakthrough.

It happened when a horse turned its back on me.

Let me explain.

I’ve spent the last few weeks in Thailand, training, working, and reflecting on what I want to build — both personally and professionally. But during my final week, I hit a wall. Not physically, but mentally.

I was stuck in a loop — the kind of anxiety spiral where your mind latches onto everything you haven’t done. The guilt of being away from home. The fear of falling behind. The questioning of whether you're showing up enough.

I tried all the tools: yoga, movement, journaling, good food, even connection. Nothing grounded me.

And then, on a whim, I jumped in a taxi and rode 40 minutes out to a stunning equestrian centre. I didn’t know why I was going. I just felt pulled.

When I arrived, the setting was beautiful. Peaceful. Everything you’d want it to be. I walked toward the horses, heart open, hoping for a spark of connection.

But they turned away.

Not aggressively. Not anxiously. Just... disinterested.

At first, I felt rejected. Triggered. Isn’t that the worst fear for so many of us? That we reach out — and nothing reaches back.

And then I realised: this wasn’t rejection. It was reflection.

The horses were mirroring my energy. The overthinking. The gripping. The internal chaos.

They weren’t saying “go away.” They were showing me what I needed to see: I was trying to think my way back into presence. But horses don’t respond to thought. They respond to truth.

In that moment, I breathed. I softened. I surrendered.

I stopped trying to connect and instead let myself be.

And guess what? Slowly, gently, the energy shifted. One of the horses turned toward me. No demand. No force. Just presence.

It was the reminder I needed:

You can’t force your way into alignment. You can’t rush your way into healing. You can’t overwork your way into connection.

Especially not with horses. Especially not with yourself.

So if you’ve been feeling off, stuck, or anxious lately — maybe it’s not about doing more. Maybe it’s about surrendering more.

Let the silence teach you. Let the horse mirror you. And when the horse turns away? Turn inward.

That’s where the lesson lives.